Dumbass Customer Service, this is Hal…

And people wonder why this country is going to hell in a hand basket. It’s because people are getting dumber, and they’re the ones that we then have to go to when we need help with something outside our own areas of expertise. Sometimes I wonder if a group of trained chimpanzees might not be a better customer service workforce in some cases.

We bought a very expensive washer a few years ago that washes clothes very well. But a while ago, it started to develop a musty smell. We did some of those oxywash/bleach things and it kept it at bay. But lately, it’s not getting better. Doing some research, we found out that some older models of front-loading washers had a problem that the water would never fully drain out of the basin correctly. Then, mold would grow in the basin, creating that musty smell.

It turns out that Maytag actually did a ‘recall’ that allowed users to get this flaw fixed. So, Shari decided that we should call Whirlpool to see if they do the same thing. It turns out, they DON’T. This is the conversation she just had. It started out with her asking if they will fix the problem like Maytag did.

He: “There was a flaw in the design of an earlier model, but your model was manufactured after that, so the best I can do is send you out a cleaning solution.”
Me: OK, so, you fixed a design flaw and I bought one that still has this problem. Am I following you so far?
He: Yes Ma’am
Me: So, this cleaning solution you are sending me. I’ll have to keep doing that over and over?
He: Yes Ma’am.
Me: OK, is it just me or does that not make sense?
He: Umm, well, I’m sorry that’s the best we can do for you. And this mold will not harm you.
Me:  Of course it will harm us.
He: No, ma’am, this is a non-harmful kind.
Me:  OK, what kind of mold is it then?
He:Well, I…uh… can tell you that it’s not the bacterial kind.
Me: OK, Now, I’m sure this sounds crazy. I have a machine that doesn’t drain water effectively, grows mold, and the best you can do is send me cleaning solution that I have to run as often as I run the bleach now?
He: I can have a member of the Executive team call you…
Me: Yes, I think that’s a very good idea.”

Yeah, asshat, I’m fairly sure it’s not mold of the bacterial kind – mold is a fungus. Learn your five kingdoms of classification, you half-brain. And send me a new frickin’ washer.